I get really annoyed because I can’t hug it.

Since many of you don’t spend as much time online as I do and you’re busy with like, your lives and stuff, I felt it was important to let you all know what’s going on today with regard to the future of free speech in the United States.

Today many websites such as Wikipedia are going on strike to raise awareness of the dangers posed by SOPA and PIPA, two pieces of legislation that would give the US government unprecedented control to censor the Internet in a way that has only currently been seen in places like China and Iran. This legislation is a major assault by media moguls, lobbyists, and the politicians whose pockets they line against the fundamental freedoms of the Internet.

If the people who built the Internet think this is a terrible idea, perhaps we should listen. This video provides a plain English description of the legislation and why it is in violation of our basic principles of democratic freedom.

PROTECT IP / SOPA Breaks The Internet

And just in case you want an even clearer (and funnier) explanation, The Oatmeal has explained beautifully what this legislation means to creative people who engage in fair use. For example, this legislation could run my Etsy shop into the ground because one of my items is inspired by a video game. Even worse, Etsy could get sued for hosting the store. Sound silly to you? Not if you’re a lawyer who wants to ensure that ideas can be controlled and made profitable for your bosses in the entertainment industry.

The government should not become the arbiter of free speech. It’s unconstitutional and violates the principles this country was founded on. The site americancensorship.org has been set up to make it easy for you to message your Senator today. If you are so inclined, I’d strongly urge you to speak up. The Internet is a powerful tool for good in our world, and I believe it’s worth protecting.

Love to you all,

– Stella

I feel like I need to start the Internet Barbarian League or something.

Wrong. Tonight the Facebook identity gestapo caught on to my little caper. They won’t let me log in because, geniuses that they are, they suspect I’m not using my real identity on that account. Good job, detectives. I suspect my account got flagged because for some time I’ve been ignoring their demands to add phone numbers and more e-mail addresses to my account to make it “more secure.” Tres amusant. My data becomes more secure when I give more of it away? Uh-huh. I would hazard a guess that people who like their privacy are also more prone to pseudonyms. That’s never jived with Facebook. They want their users to cough up the data, and cough it up now. Many people willingly vomit every last detail about themselves without caring who sees. Me, not so much.

From its soulless, sterile blue and gray color scheme to the monochromatic way it categorizes all human relationships as “friends”, I’ve struggled with Facebook from the beginning. Its users — human beings the mighty Zuck referred to as “dumb fucks” — pump every detail about themselves into a system without giving a second thought to what it means. Pop quiz — did you know that hitting the “Like” button on Facebook constitutes a binding legal agreement? Turns out that South Park episode about our cavalier approach to end user license agreements wasn’t so far off the mark.

I tried putting “Loki Kitteh” back in as his new name. Tron must have stopped fighting for the users because I got another error message from Master Control:

Inauthentic Name – Temporary Block
Unfortunately, the name you entered was not approved by our system. Please wait 10 minutes and then try again.
Make sure you enter your name correctly and that it complies with our formatting guidelines. Please note that if your next attempt is also unsuccessful, your account may be disabled.

Inauthentic name? How about inauthentic service? How about creativity stifling identity police? How about there’s nothing wrong with nicknames, pseudonyms, and playing with authorial personas? If Mark Twain were still alive, would you be breaking his balls because he failed to write “Samuel Clemens” next to his Social Security Number on your signup sheet?

Beyond the problem of requiring real-life identity is the issue of what friendship is supposed to be about — enjoying yourself. Loki is pretty damn funny and interacting with my friends on his behalf is fun. FUN. Do you know what that is, Facebook, or did you miss out on that because you were too busy not being invited to parties in college? Do you even know what the Internet is for? Don’t you KNOW that it’s ruled by cats?

At the end of the day, it’s Facebook’s walled garden and if they want to shake down everyone for ID at the door I guess that’s their own affair. The problem is, I really don’t have an aternative. As sketchy as Facebook’s privacy policies are, Google’s are downright evil. Anything you give to either social network is theirs. Forever. No tap tap takebacks. But if you give it to Google+, it becomes public, able to be used by others for profit, and you lose creative control over your images and words. At least all the stuff you give to Facebook isn’t indexed by search engines. Yet.

It sucks to be sent a message by this company telling me I don’t have a place in online dialogue because having a pseudonym is more fun and comfortable for me. Guess I’m going to have to start bugging my sister for those links to her photo gallery again . . .