• Made a new dress for the little bean last night out of fabric with rocketships and planets. #happy #
• What's more messed up: that Oprah's TV channel is called own, or that Fergie is going to have a show on it? http://bit.ly/d6HVcI #
• The Trouble With Tribbles, by Edward Gorey: http://coilhouse.net/2010/07/the-trouble-with-tribbles-by-edward-gorey/ #nerdtastic #
• @Boriss Yeah they took the Psychology 101 concept of Subjective Reality, beat the dead horse, then stomped on the bits of dead horse. in reply to Boriss #

Before you say it’s too early to start thinking about Halloween, I’ll say three months is barely enough time to create a replica of a Jedi uniform circa the Clone Wars. Seeing as I collect people as nerdy as myself as friends, I will be helping out with what is probably my ninth or tenth Jedi costume.

The first two I made were way back in 1999, when some brothers I went to school with wanted to go as Obi-Wan Kenobi and Qui-Gon Jinn. They tried to persuade me to work up an Amidala costume, to which I retorted that any planet dumb enough to elect a fourteen year old girl as its ruler deserved to be invaded by robots. They were low budget costumes, but I made some lucky finds in the clearance section of the fabric store and they ended up looking a lot more lifelike as Jedis than Ewan Mcgregor and Liam Neeson ever did. (I suspect that this had less to do with my costumes and more to do with the fact that my friends had personalities.)

Many billowing polyester robes later, I’m going for this:

This will be my first non-traditional Jedi costume. In some ways it will be much easier (I don’t need to sew five layers of clothing) and much harder (how the heck am I going to make armor plating?) My friend Shawn is committed to a kickass costume, so today we planned it out and bought our first pieces. I found some cotton/poly chenille upholstery fabric for a tabard that looks like raw wool but is lighter in weight than it looks and won’t cling to other fibers. We dropped by American Apparel and bought a small long sleeved black t-shirt, and I was glad that I didn’t have to talk Shawn into accepting spandex leggings for the bottom layer. He understood, as so few before him have, that sweatpants were not an option. In the suiting section we found dark brown polyester that will make a lightweight robe that will still billow nicely and hold its shape.

To create the armor, Shawn is looking into what he could do with actual sheet metal, although I’m more inclined to buy second hand football, soccer and hockey gear, cannibalize it, and paint it. I lean heavily toward plastic parts as they don’t rip fabric, don’t make you tired, and don’t set off metal detectors at the airport, causing security to ask why there is chain mail and a morning star in your luggage. (Don’t ask.) We want the finished costume to have a nice lived-in feel, so I’ll be distressing the fabric and the armor with stains, maybe a repaired tear here or there, and blaster marks on the armor.

Tonight during two re-runs of Doctor Who I figured out the pattern and cut out the tabard. When I’ve got the whole thing figured out I’ll post the pattern here, just in case anybody else is crazy enough to try to become a Jedi in three months or less.

Two weeks ago Loki got a big sister. He seemed so lonely while we were off conquering Vega-5 and enslaving its native sentients as makers of rocking leather boots, so we carefully evaluated the prime specimen for the job and found this lovely freckled redhead:

We named her Ripley for her no-nonsense attitude and the fact that Loki does nothing but chase her like a facehugger. (He also seems to think she is a trampoline, which is as fallacious as it is problematic.) I’m hoping it’s just a rough adjustment phase, but Loki needs to get over his insane jealousy pronto and make with the friendship so that I can take many adorable photos of the two of them plotting to overthrow me together and divide the universe amongst themselves.

She is in every way the exact opposite of Loki. She is graceful and acrobatic, able to land on the finest of ledges and the most precarious of bookcases. Also unlike Loki, who can do a flying leap into a sliding glass door, rebound halfway across the room and trot off unharmed, she seems to have gotten into medical trouble first by swallowing something that scratched up her esophagus and landed her the grand prize of an emergency trip to the vet this morning. She wouldn’t eat or drink yesterday, probably because it hurt to swallow, but I wouldn’t have known that because she didn’t have the decency to get up from her comatose state and let me know what was wrong.

This morning she was given stomach acid neutralizing medicine and an IV of hydrating fluid-goo that made her back puff up like a camel’s hump and caused her to leak for a few hours if she moved around too quickly. Grody.

But I haven’t gotten to the best part. She can’t eat normal cat food because the chunks might cause problems with her sore throat and whatever horrible thing Loki convinced her to swallow in an effort to bump her off and reclaim the apartment as his own. Until she’s well, she needs pureed baby food. But she also needs incentive to eat, as eating isn’t something she’s enthusiastic to do. The doctor said I would probably have to warm it up and feed her by hand. If I was very lucky, she’d eat on her own once I get her started.

And, dear reader, I did it. That’s right. No fewer than five times today yours truly, evil robot and conqueror of worlds, was down on her knees serving a sick cat baby food with her fingers. Dude.

I’d like to submit to the Evil Robots Union that this behavior should not get me banned from our upcoming Evil Robot Swim Party and Barbecue. I count Ripley as a valuable minion to my cause, and feigning kindness to poor helpless kittehs is an excellent tool of deception to fool my meatbag neighbors into thinking I’m one of them. Really. That’s why I’m doing it. It’s not because she’s absolutely adorable and I want her to feel better. Like, right now.

• I'm enjoying the sounds of @amandapalmer playing the popular tunes of Radiohead on her magical ukulele, which I chose to pay $10 for. #
• These dudes are going to make GOBS of money doing movie special effects: http://bit.ly/aze3hQ #
• I just accidentally revealed spoilers for Terminator: Salvation to the BF. Movie's been out 1 year plus. Should I feel bad? #
• TAKE IT AWAY from Reggie Bush, the dirty betrayer of all Trojans: http://bit.ly/aEebvO #usc #fml #
• I guess the dark side needed some scratch: http://www.toplessrobot.com/2010/07/darth_vader_say_it_isnt_so.php #
• Wo, wo be unto bigots who invade the lair of geek warriors who have weathered many a flame war and trolled many a n00b: http://bit.ly/dluFCG #

Last week my XM radio preview expired. I feel that I got my money’s worth from the free trial, and I won’t be subscribing. Why?

The content blows

XM radio might be more properly called B-side radio; big hits are few and far between. Turns out that although commercials are annoying on FM radio, they sure do pay for better music. FM radio is brutally competitive; you’ve really got to be good just to do traffic, let alone host a show. Digital, commercial-free radio means content glut. Too many stations, too much time. That means blander content and lousier DJs because it’s too expensive to fill gobs of stations 24 hours a day with the good stuff.

Generic radio isn’t as fun as local radio

XM radio is international and time-zone free, making it generic. The hosts don’t have local affiliations or anything to say about where they are; they are everywhere and nowhere. I like listening to stations in LA making fun of Anaheim and San Francisco. I like hearing DJs echo my gripes about horrible traffic, and I like hearing what concerts and events are taking place around me. XM radio offers none of that, unless I want to pay more to get satellite versions of stations I already get for free on FM.

Th sign l dr ps cons ant y

I like listening to songs without ten second pauses of fuzz, which makes it hard to like XM radio. Because if you drive under, like, a tree branch, XM Radio is all “OMG SIGNAL INTERRUPTION CAN’T FUNCTION FML.” FM waves are pretty good at following you under overpasses, telephone wires, and even into plenty of tunnels. The delicate thread that connects your vehicle to a hunk of metal floating in space is too easily cut, making it hard to enjoy the mediocre content.

I can’t tell the difference

XM radio sounds a lot better than AM radio, but it doesn’t sound any different than a strong FM signal to me, and I have a good stereo in my car. (Thieves note: I also have OnStar.) Add in the constant signal droppage and FM wins out on signal quality.

So, as my XM test drive goes bye-bye, I’m extra happy for the USB port on my dash that lets me connect my iPod to my stereo. Now that’s commercial-free content that’s guaranteed to deliver.