I have been a good girl this year. reasonably well-behaved this year. I know I haven’t spoken to you in a while but it’s only because I stopped believing in you when you brought me that hideous sweater. However, in an effort to mend the breach I would like to humbly request the Rock Band Drum Rocker Premium Drum Set for Xbox 360. It’s not that I couldn’t possibly buy it for myself — it just seems a really reasonable way for you to help me restore your faith in you.

I promise that if you bring me one of those I will avoid cussing at all too much, do my very best to think about helping the poor, and devote my life to the service of rocking for the benefit of the public. Really. When considering my request you should just start thinking of all the needy children who will have their lives improved by the sight and sound of me rocking really, really hard. Just imagine their faces lighting up with the peace and joy that the gospel of Rock can bring to their lonely, difficult lives.

If I can just have the right tools, anything is possible. Ending hunger. Curing cancer. World peace. Isn’t that what we all want for Christmas? I’m just asking you to do the right thing, Santa. Do what feels right, deep down in your heart.

Respectfully yours,
Me

P.S. The Drum Throne wouldn’t be unappreciated either. Just throwing that out there.