Narcissism

We live in a society where people can document themselves to death. Anyone can now set up a shrine to themselves online, posting dozens, if not hundreds of photos of themselves. There’s a deep seated neurosis in our culture that drives us to do this– the need to be special, the need to be remembered, the need to be exposed to a world that gets bigger and bigger. A friend forwarded me some girl’s MySpace page for a laugh. You know the kind I mean. Splashed with 9,000 images of . . . herself.

I don’t know that girl at all, but I know exactly what she’s like because I see it online all the time. This is a girl who can barely spell– one of the more humorous mistakes on her site is the misspelling of the word “retarded.” She devotes every second of her day to obsessing over herself rather than improving herself and the world around her, which is the textbook definition of what makes someone shallow.

I use that girl’s site not as a personal attack, but just as a very typical example of what’s out there. All people have a need to be loved and recognized, but one of the prices of the evolution of online culture is the increased expectation of fame, recognition, and self-publicizing. People were less nuts about this when the world was a smaller place, and being a local celebrity actually meant something. When the world was composed of many little ponds, there was a lot of room for many big fish. Now we’re lost in a vast ocean, where fame means making more than six billion people aware of your presence, whether or not they ever meet you. It’s a lot to compete with, so people slap up neurotically self-absorbed websites on MySpace and Facebook in a desperate attempt to be looked at and noticed by . . . complete strangers.

It’s hard for me to understand what drives people to be loved, adored, and admired by complete strangers who they will never meet face to face. I’d rather be famous with my friends and family than recognized by a sea of unfamiliar faces. It puzzles me and makes me a little sad that so many haven’t figured out that obsessing over gaining recognition will not merit them nearly as much attention as dropping their narcissism and devoting their energy to doing good things worthy of notice and praise. It also won’t ever bring them any happiness, as it never really pays out the way that a true circle of friends and loved ones can.